Review

The notorious Bill Zebub continues his quest to make you laugh at religion while simultaneously offending you and giving you a huge boner with his new slice of blasphemy, Jesus the Total Douchebag. Zebub re-tells the New Testament his way complete with offensive racist bullshit, amazingly hot naked girls, two different Jesuses and a whole lot of sex.

We start out with the sexiest re-telling of the Immaculate Conception ever. A bored-looking Mary is hanging out all sexy and naked when God kills her newest baby, again. Naturally, he makes her fuck him again, thrusting his Holy cock down from Heaven and knocking her the fuck up. Somehow, a case of mistaken identity leads to two different Jesuses, one white and one black all leading to pretty much the racist depiction of anyone ever (yes, blackface make up and jive talk is involved.)

We then go on to follow the two Jesuses as they both try to get laid as much as possible which, of course, results in possibly the sexiest smorgasbord of naked ladies ever to appear in a Zebub film (and that's saying something.) At least a dozen women appear partially or totally nude and we get to ogle sexy things rubbing their bulbous boobs and trimmed beavs a whole fuck of a lot. There is seriously a shitload of naked lady flesh in this movie. Plus, we get to watch white Jesus coerce women into fucking him using lies and miracles to make beautiful babes let him fuck them senseless.

All in all, we were hard pretty much the entire flick from Mary's fineass pussy and titties in the opening scene right through the crucifixion and beyond. We could have done completely without the sickeningly racist shit, but that's just us: we don't dig on racist stereotypes, Bill does. Normally, we'd beat his probably racist ass into the ground, but it's goddamn hard to stay mad at anybody who puts this many beautiful naked girls in his movie.

 -- Rick Stanko